Many marriages have ended in divorce because guys believed they were ready without having ever really considered what marriage entails. Most of these same men ignored their inner voice and walked down the aisle even when they sensed their relationship was doomed, only later to painfully discover that they made a terrible mistake. Marriage isn't something to be taken lightly, and a lot of guys walk into it for all the wrong reasons. The reasons below are some of the worst you can possibly use to get married. (in no particular order of importance)
1. Unplanned pregnancy
Getting married only because your girlfriend is pregnant is bad for everyone concerned, including the baby. You should/must be an active part of your child's life, but you don't have to be in a loveless, unsuitable marriage of convenience to do it. Kids do not make marriages work.
2. Financial reasons
A marriage built solely on money and materialism is like building a house on sand. When the wind blows, your marriage will crumble. If money is the motivating force in a marriage it is certain to be an empty, cold relationship without affection. Believe me on this one, I know!
1. Unplanned pregnancy
Getting married only because your girlfriend is pregnant is bad for everyone concerned, including the baby. You should/must be an active part of your child's life, but you don't have to be in a loveless, unsuitable marriage of convenience to do it. Kids do not make marriages work.
2. Financial reasons
A marriage built solely on money and materialism is like building a house on sand. When the wind blows, your marriage will crumble. If money is the motivating force in a marriage it is certain to be an empty, cold relationship without affection. Believe me on this one, I know!
A beautiful woman may look pleasing to the eye and may have a body that is desirable, but at the same time might have a terrible personality that will make her very difficult to live with once the honeymoon is over. Deciding to marry a woman solely on the basis of her physical appearance could lead to a disastrous relationship. What a woman is like on the inside is always going to be more important than her outer beauty.
4. Family pressure
When family gets involved, whether it is pushing you to marry a certain girl or you are expected to marry a girl within a certain race or social status, there is a problem. Pressure from your family to finally tie the knot, provide grandchildren or someone to carry on the family name are never good reasons to get hitched. Determining if a woman is "wifey material" should not be a group decision.
5. You're tired of being single
It is certainly better to be single than settling for a woman you don't truly love and being miserable. Being the only unwed guy in the group may feel a bit awkward, but it's nothing compared to the agony you'll feel by getting hitched just to ensure that you're not the odd man out.
6. It seems like the next logical step
Although the logical sequence of a man's life usually includes starting a great career, buying a nice car and having a nice house, marriage doesn't always have to be one of the steps.Everyone takes different paths in life, and it's possible that yours doesn't necessarily include a walk down the aisle. Some men are just not meant to be married especially if you can't stop being more in-love with yourself to love someone else!
7. You owe it to her
Just because you’ve been with a woman for a long time, doesn’t mean that she is the one for you. In fact, some studies show quite clearly that the longer people date before marriage, the more likely they’ll get divorced.
8. Thinking you can make it work
There is a misconception that being married solidifies a broken relationship. On the contrary, it can actually emphasize what is wrong and create more problems in the partnership. When a man marries a woman because he wants to "fix", or "improve" her, there is going to be major problems.
Marriage is a sacred and God-given institution where by a man can legitimately raise a family, continue his bloodline and name. The vows given are to be kept, just like any vow, promise or agreement a man may make. A man is only as good as his word and that word should never be given frivolously.
Think before you act and save yourself (and her) years of turmoil and strife!
Would you add anything to the list?
Think. Grow. Live!
Roland N. Gilbert
Roland works one-on-one – via phone and face-to-face – and with MasterMind Groups. Through Couples Coaching Roland helps clients communicate better, find the love they want, and create relationships of significance.
Contact Roland at 800-974-3692 or rgilbert@perennialgrowth.com to determine if coaching is right for you. www.perennialgrowth.com
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