There has been much discussion among fans and critics of Facebook regarding what technically classifies as ‘cheating’ when it comes to the social network, so we’ll avoid going over that ground again here. Instead, let’s avoid definitions of cheating and look at the signs that a spouse/loved one could well be cheating (however you define it) using Facebook as a tool (or weapon, depending on how you look at it).
It goes without saying that just because you recognize one or more of the following telltale signs in your partner, that doesn't mean that they’re definitely cheating on you. There could be any number of explanations. However, if you do see any of the following signs, it might be worth having a conversation about your concerns and avoid seeing your relationship go down as another victim of Facebook cheating:
1. They will call you sweet names in your inbox but on your wall the will call you *dear* or your name.
2. If you comment on their photo they will only say (thanks dear) to avoid other people suspecting.
3. If you update a status, instead of them commenting on your wall they will comment in your inbox.
4. If you call them a sweet name on their wall he/she will not reply, the highest thing they will do is to "Like" the comment.
5. If you update a status, instead of them commenting on it he/she will only "Like" it but in your inbox they will be tell you about the ENTIRE status.
6. On your wall posts they communicate with you as they would a relative.
HERE IS HOW TO DEAL WITH IT
1. If you are in a serious relationship, you should send them a relationship request so that everyone will see who is they are in love with.
2. Instead of in-boxing, try chatting with them on their wall more. Now some always have an excuse e.g:"my mom is on Facebook and she is my friend so I don’t want her to see that I am seeing someone" or "l don't want people to know because l am protecting our relationship". There are a great deal of potential silly excuses, but my question is "till when are you gonna hide your relationship?" and "why are you hiding it since you are saying it’s a serious one?" If that means everyone is gonna know about you two then so be it.
3. Discuss how the time you spend together was, on the wall.
4. Express how much you love each other on the wall (yes it sounds crazy to some of you but at times that’s what it will take to know where you stand with your Mr/Mrs Right/Right Now) Don't be fooled guys, YOU might be the one facing these.
The only legitimate exception to ALL of these would be if their Facebook page is a "business" page as well. If that is NOT the case then:
5. Last, but not least, if you cannot do ANY of these then STOP lying to yourself that you are in a relationship with them!
Are you avoiding the obvious signs?
What would you add to the list?
Think. Grow. Live!
Roland N. Gilbert
Roland works one-on-one – via phone and face-to-face – and with Master Mind Groups. Through Couples Coaching Roland helps clients communicate better, find the love they want, and create relationships of significance. Contact Roland at 800-974-3692 or rgilbert@perennialgrowth.com to determine if coaching is right for you.
